Dealing with stress is something we all do every day, and each of us handles it differently. Though many of us know intuitively what to do, most of us are not very successful at actually dealing with pressure. The result hinders our professional performance, not to mention the mental and physical harm it causes.

It is understood that successful men and women are comparatively better at handling stress and staying calm under pressure. In fact, all of us need to learn how to stay calm and handle pressure so as not to let it affect our health or performance. So, to help you do just that, here’s a list of 11 things to avoid getting stressed out and losing your calm under pressure.

1. Focus on the present

Worrying about “what-will-happen­-after-this” in a stressful situation will only amplify the pressure on you. Getting occupied with what-if is not going to reduce stress. Instead, try to forget about it and do what you need to do to diffuse the situation NOW. Take whatever action is immediately possible, and you can worry about the “what-ifs” later on. Pushing yourself to think, plan, and take some action will distract you from future perils and prevent you from blowing your fuse at the wrong time.

2. Stop and reframe

The best way to deal with a stressful moment is to take control of your mind and start thinking of the situation from a more positive perspective. Yes, I know, much easier said than done, but if you can do this, it can take a load off your mind. The important thing to remember is that things can’t always be in our control and that the only thing that you can navigate is inside your head. Take a deep breath, think the problem through, identify what you can and cannot do about it, and force yourself to act rather than react. If there’s nothing you can do about it immediately, take a deep breath and figure out what you can do to prevent further damage.

3. Ask for advice

Don’t shy away from asking for advice. This is where your peers, mentors, friends, advisors, or colleagues come into the picture. Talk to people who have been in similar situations or have seen life. The advice may not always be useful, but it will definitely help give you insight and a better perspective on the situation. Talking to someone always relieves stress and reduces mental pressure. You can’t fix/solve everything on your own; let someone else help you out.

4. Focus on the goal

My first response is usually to get carried away with the situation at-hand and start fire-fighting without a second thought. This is a typical reaction to stress. We lose sight of the end goal and jump into the war. The wise way to deal with pressure is to take a moment to think, arrange one’s thoughts, remind ourselves of the result we’re looking for, and then decide how to act. This whole process may take a few seconds or minutes, but it serves to calm you down, give you a better view of the situation, and allow you to make the right decision.

5. You don’t have to be perfect

No one has to be. Whether you’re a team leader, the boss, or a team member, expecting perfectionism from yourself is the biggest mistake you could make. My advice – don’t. The sooner you realize this, the faster you will relieve yourself of the pressure of doing it right all the time. Plan well, do your best, and deal with hurdles to the best of your ability. You can’t ace it all the time; you’re only human.

6. Focus on the solution

A great stress buster is to stop thinking about the problem. If you turn your attention to the solution instead, you start getting ideas about how to deal with it. That itself can make you feel better. When a stressful situation comes my way, the first thing I do is ask (why me? and why now?). But if I shake that out of my mind and start concentrating on what to do next, my blood pressure comes down; I stop feeling like I’m steaming up, and I start getting good ideas to deal with the problem. Of course, it’s difficult, but the result is so much more positive.

7. Simplify

Break the problem down and find order in the chaos. Don’t blow it out of proportion and don’t get caught up in the uncertainty of it all. Clarify, understand the situation clearly, and start thinking of what needs to be done immediately to diffuse it. Identify your priorities and start working on what really matters. The less you complicate things in your head, the calmer you will stay to be able to make sensible decisions and action.

8. Be realistically optimistic

For your sake and the sake of your team, think of the positive side of the situation. Stay realistic but upbeat. Accept that things can go wrong and consciously decide to learn from them. An effective way to do this is always to be prepared for the unexpected to happen. That way, they will have less of a negative effect on you and put you under less pressure. Learn to look at the big picture, and you’ll be better equipped when something misfires.

9. Let go

A great reliever in times of stress knows when to let go. Humbly accepting that some situations are not in your control and that you need to make it play through before you can do something about it; will give you the breather you need to plan your next move.

10. Be flexible

Staying calm involves the ability to be able to change and adapt to different situations quickly. You may have had a plan, but when a situation demands to change it and to move forward, that’s what you should do. It will cause you a lot of stress if you cannot immediately realize the need for change and act upon it. Getting stuck in a rut and not being able to adapt can be a huge burden in times when you need to act fast to get results.

11. Taking time to switch off

Believe it or not, this is very important to increase your capacity to deal with stress. Taking time off to do things that you enjoy and switching off to rest and sleep are activities that build your mental and physical health and prepare you to better deal with pressure. Make it a point to do this regularly, put it down in your calendar, and take specific time out to grow your ability to handle stressful situations effectively.

No one is born to handle stress. But everyone is born with the ability to learn. Like Eleanor Roosevelt said, “What one has to do usually can be done.” It is just a question of developing your abilities to be able to do what needs to be done.

If you think about it, you’ve dealt with some stress or the other your entire life. Nothing is new, only the way you handle it changes. Be clear about your goals and your priorities, and it won’t be too much of an effort to learn what you need to succeed.

Take care!

Magbè